So with the stress of all the changes we are going through, the skinny girl will just have to wait a little bit. I just don’t have time to deal with it. The good thing is that one of the interviews I have next week is for a property that has a really really nice gym – maybe that will be the first step. Then possibly I would luck out and the insurance would cover the lapband surgery…. maybe maybe.
When we get settled and I get back on track I’ll blog some more.
We are leaving for an unexpected vacation in four weeks. I haven’t been home in over 3 years. I wonder if I could lose 26 pounds before I leave? That would put me right at 200 pounds and into some clothes I haven’t worn in forever. I’ll keep you all informed of my progress.
My plan:
No soda – lots of water – no food after 7 – reallly really careful about what I am eating and no indulgences. It’s only four weeks, 28 days – surely it can be done???
I weighed myself today – 226 lbs (hence the desired 26 pounds)
You know those moments in a battle to lose weight when a shirt fits better or pants won’t stay up or someone notices a difference – those are the happy moments. 
I had one today. One of my friends at work, Tina, phoned my extension to tell me that she had seen me walking across the office and that she had thought to herself, “Mony is losing weight.” YAH! NICE – happy moment.
From someone who does battle with this and has for a long time, I have just two pieces of advice: Don’t compliment someone’s weight loss unless you truly can see it and don’t criticize or judge what the eat, or even comment on it – trust me if they are trying to lose weight, they are aware of everything that goes in their mouths and what potential effect it will have on their efforts. Maybe you think you are helping them by holding them accountable, but unless they solicited that help from you it will only have an undesirable effect for both of you. Everyone has moments of weakness and when we find ourselves in that moment, we don’t need any help feeling guilty about it.
So a few weeks ago, the editor (my boss) is doling out stories to all the reporters for an up and coming special section of the newspaper, Healthy Living. We are all tossing around story ideas and figuring out who is going to write what. Someone says, “Well what’s the new hot Hollywood diet? Maybe we could do something on that.” As an overweighter, this irked me b/c I know that those diets don’t work – they’re just garbage preying on the desperation of the overweighters. So I say something about doing a story on slow and steady weight loss, lifestyle changes – something that does work (granted when I said this I was down 13 pounds and it was before the fried food fiasco – side note: I went up to 231 and have gotten back down to 226 -Yah me! lol) next thing I know the editor says, “Oh yeah, that’s a good idea. Why don’t you write about what you’ve been doing.”
UMMMM ok, not what I had in mind, but I love to write and sure, ok, why not???? So I wrote the story. It got tweaked and the edges smoothed a little and viola it was published yesterday. At the end of the story, I invited readers to follow my journey to its eventual successful ending on this blog.
The story was edited pretty extensively to fit into the space available. If you would like to read the original story you can see it here: http://theskinnygirlwantsout.wordpress.com/the-story-from-the-healthy-living-tab/
What I guess didn’t really penetrate through to my brain was that people were going to do just that and that I would have to be accountable to what I had written. WOW! ok.
So I got an email from a reader saying she was going to follow my story and that what I had written had really touched her because it was so similar to her own struggle. She said I was an inspiration to her – that’s a little overwhelming to me. I don’t feel like an inspiration but maybe by the end of all of this I will.
So I will continue to write about my ups and downs and would love feedback, advice, ideas or encouragement from my readers. I will continue to post photos for a visual accounting of this journey. I added some this weekend. A couple of more from my skinnier days and one from April 07, when I was going to the gym and following the “Eating for your blood type” eating plan. I had gotten down to 209.
Money is so tight right now that it is really hard to shop healthy. I will keep trying to figure that one out and keep you all posted if I do. It aggravates me that you can buy a 3 pound bag of apples (approx. 8-10 apples) for $4.00 at the grocery store (average) but you can buy 10 snack cakes for $1.19, so for the same price you can get 8-10 apples you can get 35 snack cakes. You can buy frozen broccoli for $3.00 for a fairly small bag or a can of green benas for $1.59. I know the frozen broccoli is healthier but the green beans are cheaper. When you are on a budget, stretching every dollar – these things have to be considered.
I want to run the stairs at the London Bridge, but need someone to go with me for two reasons. I have a couple little kids that would have to go with me and I don’t want to be at the top of the stairs with them at the bottom playing and have something happen to them, so someone I could take turns with going up and down while we watched each other kids – something like that. Plus, if I knew someone was expecting me to show up at a certain time to exercise I would be do it more often than just pushing myself. Any takers???
I really feel like I have been doing good. As a matter of fact the scale reflected that last week showing that I had lost 13 pounds to be down to 224 pounds. I was pretty excited and for the first time since we started my husbands asks me how much weight I’ve lost b/c he can see a little difference.
I have a friend, Jeff, who was working at a local restaurant and the owner of the restaurant decided to close up and call it quits – yikes for Jeff who is now jobless but he let Jeff have a bunch of the food from the fridges and stuff so it wouldn’t go to waste. Jeff thought of us and brought us some of the food. With the financial situation we are in – we were in no position to turn down free food. The problem is that it is all frozen food that has to be deep fried. Things like onion rings and mozzarella sticks and butterfly shrimp. So I love these foods – the main reason they are never in my house is b/c I will eat them and sure enough I did. The food came to us Sunday night. Monday night we cooked grilled steak (healthy – couple good points) and shrimp and mozz. sticks and green beans (from a can – semi healthy). When I was done with dinner I just felt greasy and a little sick.
Yesterday for lunch I had steak quesadillas. I took the leftover steak and mixed it with cheddar cheese and white flour tortillas, a little butter on each side and some salsa and called it lunch. For dinner we had spaghetti and green beans and garlic bread. I had about a cup of noodles and sauce, 1/2 c. of green beans and one slice of garlic bread (first meal in days that felt like it was sticking in any way shape or form to the plan).
I stepped on the scale this morning only to find that I am back up to 227. Making this life change at a time in our life when we don’t have money to buy groceries with any regularity and have at time just not known where our next meal was coming from and having to accept what others have generously given us is difficult to do successfully. I guess the good news is that when money starts to loosen up a little and we can buy groceries, I know what to buy to make this change stick.
That’s all for now. Be blessed.
nutrition information obtained from www.caloriking.com
16 oz water
1 medium banana (70 cal / .3 g fat / 1mg sodium / 23g carbs / 2.6g fiber / 12.4g sugar / 1.1g protien)
special K double chocolate protein bar (180 cal / 4.5g fat / 190mg sodium / 25g carbs / 5g fiber / 15g sugar / 10g protien)
8 oz diet dr. pepper (o cal/ og fat / 55mg sodium / o carbs / o fiber / o sugar / o protien)
Taco night leftover quesadilla – 1 Tbs of butter, 2 tortillas, 3/4 c. of taco-seasoned ground beef, 1/4 c. refried beans ( I have no idea how many calories this was)
1/2c. cookies and cream ice cream (150 cal)
5 oz ground beef (73% lean – it was on sale, we’re in a recession – budgeting is hard on a diet), leaf lettuce, roma tomatoes and 1/4c. cheddar cheese, mustard
iced tea
Not my best day. not my worst. I didn’t make it out to exercise. I didn’t drink enough water. But I found a good alternative for breakfast, didn’t have any regular soda and choose a salad over the chili mac everyone else had for dinner. Little steps.
When I weigh myself, which I do pretty much every day, I always do it right after I wake up and pee and before I do anything else. I’m one of those funny people who weigh myself with as little on as possible – probably doesn’t make much difference but it is a habit born of years and years of repetition.
So Jan. 28, I weighed myself. 226 pounds. That’s 11 pounds lost since I started all this. I still haven’t found the time to do much exercise. Well, not structured exercise anyway. I do funny things around my house though. Like the other night I squat walked back and forth across my living room like 5 times and my legs were sore for three days. When I am waiting for something to cook in the microwave I use the counter for balance and do ballet squats or leg lifts. Me and the kids were just jumping up and down in the living room yesterday and every time I think about it I suck in my tummy so that it feels like my belly button is in my back and tighten the booty cheeks and hold that for a count of 20 or 30.
Food changes – not much new in this area. I found that Diet Dr. Pepper is a bearable diet soda, so I switched to that at home – but they don’t sell it in our vending machine at work so I have been drinking one can of regular Dr. Pepper a day. I was eating a small bag of Gardettos for breakfast every day (damn vending machine) and then I read the nutrition info. Found something new to eat for breakfast. I am still eating only until I am not hungry and when I get a sweet tooth I don’t deny it, I’ll just a little of something sweet or I found a gum that does the trick for me the strawberry banana gum from extra. So far so good.
The main thing I think that is helping me is that I’m not obsessed with losing weight and I didn’t make major life changes and I’m not forcing myself to eat foods I don’t like. Right now, I’m just eating less and finding healthier alternatives to the make-me-fat foods I was ingesting on a regular basis. Taking pictures of myself everyday is helping too because for some reason in my mind’s eye I look very different than I do in real life. So seeing the reality of the way I look, makes me stick to it more.
I want a ooeeyy goooeeeeyyy chocolate cupcake warm with the filling oozing out and big glass of whole milk. That’s my day in a nutshell. My day is sucking. Pray that I have the strength to resist the hostess isle.
So the other night we had breakfast for dinner. We had biscuits with homemade milk gravy, bacon, scrambled eggs. I had two biscuits (with too much gravy – one of my weaknesses) 2 pieces of bacon and maybe the equivilant of one egg. I throughouly enjoyed my meal. I ate slow so I would get full and I didn’t go back for seconds.
A friend of mine, a very small (skinny) friend of mine that I babysit for came over to pick her son and dinner was still warm with plenty of leftovers so I invited her to help herself and she found herself inhaling deeply and swishing a finger through the gravy. She asked if it was made from scratch told me how good it was and proceeded to take a teaspoon and fill it with the gravy and eat it. I laughed when I saw her do this and told her it tastes much better on the biscuits. And she says ohhh no, I don’t eat carbs even though I love them.
So I eat what I love and love to eat and have to settle for the way I look in my clothes. And she looks wonderful (skinny) in her clothes and has to settle for not eating what she loves.
half a dozen of one, six of the other… With a husband who thinks I am a sex goddess and the most beautiful woman on the planet (these are not unfounded statements – he reminds me of this all the time) and my health mostly ok, I wonder if I will ever truly give up my love of food for the love of the way I look???
Just with the few changes I have implemented and without exercise I have lost 9 pounds in about a month.
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